Hilarity

Okay kids,
I've got a bit of advice that might server you well-
If you meet any person you may consider as a significant other,
and you really like them, then
take it slow.
Or better yet,
don't even fuckin' talk to them.
They're probably a dick.
I'm just saying that the likely-hood of them not being a dick
in consideration of them most likely being a dick is pretty slim.
They'll seem cool,
and if you're of the persuasion that ignorance is bliss,
then stop reading and have a great time.
But say one day you drink a little bit too much,
get crazy ideas in your head to play with the phone of this person,
and find a slue of love messages sent to her ex yesterday.
Then also imagine that this is the same ex that broke your windshield with a brick,
jumped you two times, and called your mom's house at 3 in the morning just to tell
her that your a bad man for fucking his ex-girlfriend.

It just isn't Christian.

This is a funny mess I've gotten myself into.
It's funny in the sense that about a week ago she moved into a new apartment
and had no furniture.
It's a mess I can't get out of in the sense that I was all like "Sweetness, I have a storage locker full of shit you can use!"
She has an apartment full of my stuff.
roflol.

Fuck, I really just don't want to get another storage locker.